New York Jets Interested in Trading for Bartolo Colon

With the NFL Draft only days away, sources close to the New York Jets have said they are interested in trading for New York Mets number one starter Bartolo Colon.

One unnamed source quoted New York Jets GM Mike Maccagnan as saying, “We are looking for winners in this Jets organization and Bartolo Colon is a perfect 4-0 this season. Last year the New England Patriots were 2-2 after four games and they went on to win the Super Bowl. With Bartolo Colon we already would have had a two game lead.”

It’s not just Bartolo Colon’s ability to win that intrigues the Jets so much, it’s his on the field intangibles and attributes that really turned heads.

Jets offensive coordinator Chan Galey was overhear exclaiming, “Did you see Bartolo Colon nimbly nab A.J. Pierzynski in that rundown?! First he outsmarts Pierzynski to induce the rundown then like a GPS tracking system locates him with precision and quickness. If that’s not elite talent then I don’t know what is!?”

Let’s not forget what the Jets like the most about Bartolo Colon, his size. Galey continued his glowing critique.

“Coming in at 265 pounds Bartolo Colon is a little larger than two-time Super Bowl winning quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and two-time NBA champion LeBron James. The blueprint is size and he’ll be a hard one to bring down.”

Colon hopefully won’t be taking many hits even though he’s been known to lay some lumber himself. He currently has a many RBI’s (2) as former All-Stars Adrian Beltre and Jacoby Ellsbury despite taking 90% fewer at-bats.

New Jets head coach Todd Bowles raved about this at a recent golf outing.

“No doubt Jets fans are going to love that he excels in many different areas. Bartolo Colon is as close to flawless as there is and he’ll help usher in a new era of New York Jets football.”

The Jets are expected to be offering three first round draft picks plus Darrelle Revis and will pay the remainder of the $20+ million owed to the retired Bobby Bonilla for Colon.

“We just hope it’s enough,” said New York Jets owner Woody Johnson.