Shop Bacon Sports
       

Sports Poem: If you don’t root for Tiger Woods, you’re an idiot

tiger-woods-sports-poem

Ernie Els, yeah he’s solid as oak,

Sergio Garcia? No wait he’ll choke.

Donald and Westwood might make a run,

Let’s watch them on Sunday, that will be fun! (not)

How about the Ausi, Adam Scott,

Well he did win the Masters and is kinda hot.

Who won the Open, Justin Rose?

Who gives a shit, nobody knows.

Hey did you watch the PGA?

The leaders were Dufner and Furyk by the end of the day.

Dufner throws in dips and has a hot wife,

But then he talked and it was like scratching a plate with a knife.

You may like Kuchar, you think his name’s Matt,

You like John Daily because he’s drunk and he’s fat.

Dustin Johnson? Who gives a shit.

David Duval? Didn’t he quit?

Bubba is sick and has a cool name?

But he cried at the Masters and that’s slightly lame.

You can root for Rory he’s done pretty well,

But he’s Irish and toothy and ugly as hell.

The fact is you like Tiger, stop kidding yourself.

Do you have a pic of Bo Van Pelt on your shelf?

The answer is no because that guy sucks,

The only problem with Tiger is he curses and fucks.

Don’t act like you do not want him to win,

What’s the last tourney you watched that he wasn’t in?

The answer is none or you’re lying to me,

Tiger is golf, now you can see.

 

YOU SHOULD LIKE BACON SPORTS ON FACEBOOK HERE

 

OTHER ARTICLES YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE:

Eric Simon
I root for all of the sickest teams/players in sports, and I have a legitimate reason for each one. I am from Tucson, AZ so I love U of A basketball. My dad is from New York so I'm a Yankees fan, and I went to USC so I'm a Trojan. I hate underdogs and anyone that would ever root for the Spurs. I would be on the Dark Side of the force and I would be in Slytherin if I went to Hogwarts. I haven't played with anyone on the golf course that can hit the ball further than me in eight years. If you're reading this, I can beat you in ping pong or chess. Also, I was given the useless gift to write poems. So, now I write sports poems.
Eric Simon

@thepudgycaddy

What everyone is thinking but nobody is saying
Eric Simon
Eric Simon

Latest posts by Eric Simon (see all)

3 Comments Extra Bacon
Powered by
Tip Line

Bacon Sports. A Sports Comedy Blog.

Thanks for visiting BaconSports.com. A sports comedy blog that combines sports, comedy, fun and awesomeness. We create original content that hopefully makes you laugh and drops some sports knowledge. We are the #1 site for random jerseys so send us any random jerseys you see on the streets. Part of USA Today Sports Media.