Tony Parker Rap Breakdown

In 2007, Tony Parker was on top of the game. The Frenchmen was living the American dream in the NBA making boatloads of cash. He had already won two championships and was well on his way to a third. He was dating the smoking hot actress Eva Longoria. There was only one thing left to do. Release a rap album.

Parker’s album TP is little known in America and for good reason. The album’s rap verses are entirely in French, Tony’s first language, so it is no surprise it received little notice in the states, but the album did get some play in France. The single Balance-Toi even reached number one on French charts for one week. Parker also released this song aptly titled Top of the Game featuring Fabolous. The video has brief cameos by Tim Duncan, Robert Horry, and oddly enough, Brent Barry, who’s wife Parker was rumored to be banging causing both of their marriages to fail. While he looks a bit ridiculous in the video, it seems like he may have some clue what he is doing on the mic.

This all got me wondering, is it possible Tony Parker is the French Jay-Z dropping knowledge and lyrical genius that is lost on us Americans? I had to find out, so I took the lyrics of Parker’s Top of the Game verse and plugged them into Google Translate and here is what it spit out.

French:
Ok, j’accélère, ne blague pas, le but flinguer les mots
Le profil de l’emploi, le beat je viens l’égorger

T’as du souci à t’faire, mes soldats sont dans les tranchées

Le rap pris en otage en quatre mesures, tu cries danger


Mon flow coule sans ‘blème

Pousse le volume dans ta caisse et ça fait boum boum clap

Kore et Skalp à la prod’ on vient bousiller ça

L’industrie du disque flippe de Paris aux USA
V’la l’OVNI Un style barge dopé, aux amphét’
Chorale règlements d’comptes

C’est Tony sans Montana à la conquête du monde

Et si la presse est sceptique, qu’elle m’écoute quelques secondes
J’ai rien à prouver sauf à moi-même et à mes sauces

Que j’ai les bastos qui faut dans l’chargeur

Lyricale pause, j’explose, ose via ma prose

J’te propose Top of the game à haute dose

English:
Ok, I accelerate, not kidding, the goal gun down words
The profile of employment, I just beat the kill
You got to worry t’faire, my soldiers in the trenches
Rap kidnapped in four steps, you scream hazard
My flow is flowing ‘problem
Grows up in your car and it’s boom boom clap
Kore and Skalp the prod we just trashing it
The recording industry scared from Paris to USA
V’la UFO A barge style doped with amphet ‘
Chorale regulations accounts
It’s not Tony Montana to Conquer the World
And if the press is skeptical, she listens to me a few seconds
I have nothing to prove except to myself and my sauces
I bastos which must in charger
Lyricale break, I exploded, via dare my prose
J’te offers Top of the game in high doses

So as you can see from the translation, Tony has nothing to prove except to himself and his sauces, his flow is a flowing problem, and I’m as confused as ever about where to slot Tony Parker’s rap skills in our Raplete Rankings.