Hall of FameSports

Rare Air Jordans + News TV Camera = Comedy Gold

By August 15, 2012 No Comments

This is a video of a live news telecast that is reporting from the scene of a mall where the latest Air Jordan’s are being released. People are lined up outside this mall like Len Bias and Tupac are there giving out autographs. You can fast forwarded to the 1 minute mark to get to where the good stuff starts. This video has so much comedy in it that I had to break it down.

This guy loves his new Air Jordan’s so much that he was willing to, without being asked, lick the bottom of his new shoes on camera. If this photo isn’t an ad for the new Nike Air Jordan’s then I don’t know what is. “Dudes be loving our shoes so much they be licking them…the new Air Jordan’s…only $199 at your nearest Foot Locker”.

How do you redeem yourself after you lick your shoe on local tv? By rocking an old school Houston Rockets World Champion t-shirt. Nice work.

At the 1:19 mark this lady drops what is most definitely the quote of the video: “…what if your child get ammonia for a pair of shoes?” Yep…ammonia. Nothing else needs to be said.

John Donnelly must have gone to the Chris Broussard school of reporting because he drops this gem on us at the 1:24 mark, “…now we do have some reports that we weren’t able to confirm that some people have actually had their shoes taken from them by other people….who uh…actually saw him waiting at a bus stop….we don’t know if that’s true or not…” I am no Shefty but this has to be the worst piece of reporting that I’ve ever seen. Lets start with the beginning of his sentence, “now we do have some reports that we weren’t able to confirm”. What the hell is that? How can you take yourself seriously as a reporter if you are essentially telling the audience “whatever I’m about to tell you more than likely is total dog crap”. Here’s a report that I wasn’t able to confirm, someone just saw Reggie Lewis and Hank Gathers shooting hoops at the gym earlier today. (I don’t know why I’m on a dead basketball player kick right now but for some reason this video brought it out of me). The next thing that John does that’s awesome is that he says “…that some people have actually had their shoes taken from them by other people”. Well that sure is good to know that stray dogs or the Pontiac Aztec in the parking lot wasn’t the one who took the shoes. It was actually people…opposed to what? Idiot.

Just a hunch but I’m guessing that John Donnelly and these two guys…err High Schoolers aren’t from the same area.

From our man Curtis “I’m a shoe connoisseur…I been getting shoes…it was crazy out here like…you know me and a group of my friends…you know…from Lake-Wood…we get a lot of money so it’s nuttin to us to buy shoes”. Well said Curtis, well said.

At the 2:16 mark Curtis comes up with the brilliant idea to have Michael Jordan sell all the shoes at his house and instead of people going to the mall to buy the shoes, they go to MJ’s crib. I’m sure Nike, David Stern, the Charlotte Bobcats, and Michael Jordan would be 100% on board for this idea. Based on the little bit of knowledge he’s dropped on us so far I’m confident that Curtis would be a better GM than Isiah Thomas was.

In sales they teach you to always be closing. Curtis’s boy takes his 30 seconds on camera to talk about how the “Get Money Boyz” has some shoes that they are selling. As Ricky Ross says, “every day I’m huss-a-lin'”.

After his exchange with the Get Money Boyz is over John Donnelly proceeds to awkwardly laugh for 11 straight seconds while trying to shoo them away, make sure that they don’t rob him, and to make sure that everyone knows that he’s not racist even though he’s very uncomfortable and way out of his element.

Money Makin Maniakz

At the 3:08 mark of the video you see that the second member of the Get Money Boyz has “Money Makin Maniakz” on the back of his jacket. I believe that I just found the new name for my fantasy football team.

The video ends by the in studio anchor asking John if he saw a guy lick his pair of shoes and when John tries to respond the anchor completely ignores him, talks over him, throws in his own “it’s got to be the shoes” quip,  and then ends the segment. I think it’s safe to say that on the totem pole of importance at Fox 26 John ranks somewhere between Joe Dirt and the average at best looking intern that people will sleep with because she’s “attainable”.

Upon watching this video one last time I noticed in the beginning that the Get Money Boyz actually see that John Donnelly is doing a live news report and decide to “live TV bomb” (opposed to photobomb) him. From there they have the car they are in stop and drop them off and then you see them running across the street towards John. Look over his left shoulder or go to the 0:21 second mark of the video to see what I mean. Very nice work Get Money Boyz. That’s how you hustle!

Special shout out to Gibson Smith for this video find. 

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Rob Cressy

Rob Cressy

Sports loving free throw specialist and yinzer living in Chicago who is awesome most of the time, has run with the bulls in Spain, and is a graduate of Second City's Improv program.