What was Wilt Chamberlain better at: Basketball or Having Sex?

By September 17, 2011June 18th, 2018No Comments

Basketball Career

  • He played for the Globetrotters prior to playing in the NBA.
  • In his best Season (61-62′) Wilt Chamberlain averaged 50.4 points and 25.7 rebounds per game
  • For his career he averaged 30.1 points, 22.9 boards, and 4.4 assists.
  • He was a 51% free throw shooter. Imagine if he shot even a putrid 63% from the line.
  • In his last year playing he shot 72% from the field
  • He only won 2 championships (somewhere Steve Kerr and Robert Horry are laughing)
  • In 67-68′ he lead the league in assists. He told everyone ahead of time that he’d lead the league in assists that year. This was the first and only time a center ever led the league in assists.

Doing Business

 He claims to have had sex with over 20,000 women. He died at age 63. Lets break this down into simple terms. Here’s some assumptions: he didn’t start having sex until age 12. Wilt was definitely an early bloomer. Ages 12 – 35 were his prime banging years. You know that he was laying the lumber then. This accounts for 65% of his output. Ages 35 – 63 he was still punching the time card but not at as good of a rate as before. Even a train car slows down sometime. This accounts for 35% of his output. He lived for about 23,000 days (slightly over 63 years). Based on this:

  • He had sex 2.74 times per day during his “hittin it like it’s gonna spoil” era
  • That breaks down to having sex once every 8 hours and 45 minutes…for 13 straight years
  • He had sex 1.07 times per day during his “Derek Jeter rounding out his baseball career” era
  • That breaks down to having sex once every 22 hours and 30 minutes…for 18 straight years.
  • For his entire life he averaged having sex 0.87 times per day.

I’m not sure what’s more impressive, 50 points per game and 72% shooting or almost “practicing making babies” once a day for every day that he lived. Lets just say that Wilt did OK at both.

Rob Cressy

Rob Cressy

Sports loving free throw specialist and yinzer living in Chicago who is awesome most of the time, has run with the bulls in Spain, and is a graduate of Second City's Improv program.