Hall of FameSports

In honor of Bonnaroo the worst songs sung by professional athletes

By June 6, 2012 No Comments

I am leaving tonight to for Bonnaroo to go be a dirty hippie so I’m not going to be posting again until next Tuesday. In honor of these four glorious days of music goodness I thought it would be fun to bring you some of the best (or worst) of athletes who also tried their hand at being a musician. Somehow these athletes heads/egos are so big that they assume that just because they are elite athletes that it also means that they are elite singers. That most certainly is not the case.

The mac daddy of all athletes turned rappers has to be Shaq. Back in the day I owned the Shaq: Diesel tape (yes, tape) and loved every second of it. I’m sure you can just recite all of his best songs off the top of your head but in case you need a refresher here are three of the best ones: What’s Up Doc (w/Fu-Schnickens), (I Know I Got) Skillz, and this gem Shoot Pass Slam:

There are few things in life that I enjoy more than hearing Carl Lewis attempt to sing the National Anthem. I could listen to it 10 times a day for a year and it still would not get old/stop being funny. Thank you Carl Lewis for making my life that much better. Close your eyes and just let the sound resonate through your body:

Steve Francis made over $103 million in his NBA career. Apparently having that much money gives you the right to put out a horrible rap song and video about how you have so much money.

I really wanted to have you listen to John Daly’s song “You Don’t Know Me” but apparently the song is so bad that the internet has rejected it from being posted anywhere. Instead I’ll have to give his hit song “I Found It” (note: I’m using the word “hit” very loosely).

Bronson Arroyo claims to be a legitimate musician. He put out an album of cover songs titled Covering the Bases that I actually own. It was given to me by a friend as I was moving from Cincinnati to Chicago and had a 5 hour drive ahead of me. Talk about the gift that keeps on giving. You can check out Bronson’s version of “Better Man” by Pearl Jam. I don’t believe that is Bronson’s best performance though. That distinction goes to his performance in the JTM commercial below. I’m all for getting paid but there’s no way that I want my name attached to JTM’s. Unless you live in a fraternity house and have to grill out for 75 dudes there is no reason why any person should eat them. They taste like…well…Bronson Arroyo’s music career.

Also receiving votes: Juan Pierre rapping after the World Series, Justin Forsett singing a song dedicated to his wife, Rashad McCants couldn’t play in the NBA and he shows us that he also can’t rap, 76ers Lou Williams spitting some rhymes, and Kevin Durant should probably just stick to being a ridiculously good baller.

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Rob Cressy

Rob Cressy

Sports loving free throw specialist and yinzer living in Chicago who is awesome most of the time, has run with the bulls in Spain, and is a graduate of Second City's Improv program.