I went to a Dave Matthews Band show up at Alpine Valley in Wisconsin and was pretty sure that Hoopster Nation was going to be out in full force. Young college guys love jerseys as much as they do Natty Light, black lights, and “taking one for the team”. Unfortunately the youth of the crowd worked against them as they didn’t have the deep NBA knowledge to bring out anything more than some as to be expected jersey. Here’s what I saw:
This Penny Hardaway Orland Magic jersey will be the first of three of the most common Hoopster jerseys that you’ll see. When Penny Hardaway was on the Magic he was cool. Him and Shaq were an exciting duo and the Lil’ Penny commercials were creative. Who wouldn’t like a doll voiced by Chris Rock that talks smack? The problem is that Hardaway was too popular and now that Hoopsters want to bring back jerseys of players that they loved he is near or at the top.
Here’s some Penny Hardaway random knowledge for you:
- He made over $120 million for his career.
- His peak earning years were the two that he spent with the New York Knicks. While there he earned $14.6 and $15.7 million per year. What did that get the Knicks? Not even 10 ppg and he only started 4 games.
- He went to Memphis State University (which is now just Memphis).
- He finished his career with the Miami Heat (now that would be a baller jersey to have).
Y’inzer Steelers fan + Dave Matthews Band fan = this guy. I wish that I could say that this was the only occurrence of a jersey like this but it was not.
The only way that I’d rock a Latrell Sprewell jersey is if it was a Golden State Warriors one. His time on the Knicks was pretty standard minus one incident where he broke his hand when he slipped on his yacht. Totally believable. Sprewell may not have been a model citizen but the dude could ball. If you are going to rock his jersey then you need to instantly bring up him choking PJ Carlesimo or the fact that he can’t feed his family despite making over $97 million for his career.
Chicago Cubs fans + Dave Matthews Band fans = this. What makes this great is that most people assume that Cubs fans don’t really care about the team and only go to the games to get drunk. These jerseys definitely support that argument. One way that you could make this jersey even more over the top would be to make it #41 (which is a Dave Matthews song). That would take the comedy level up several notches.
Like the Penny Hardaway Magic jersey this Chris Webber Golden State Warriors jersey is about as common as they come. The theme that you’ll see with these often worn jerseys is that the player was really good and it’ll be from his first team. What you may not realize is that Chris Webber actually finished his career with the Golden State Warriors. He played in only 9 games and gave them a whopping 3.9 ppg. That earned him $602,173 (not a bad pay for 2 weeks work). For his career he earned over $178 million.
This Shawn Kemp Seattle Supersonics jersey is probably the most common of all Hoopster jerseys that you’ll see. Why? Because he could throw down some monster dunks and when evaluating a potential jersey purchase you are more likely to go with that over some guy who was great at dishing out assists like John Stockton. When thinking about Shawn Kemp’s career I feel like we all got a little bit cheated. When he was with the Supersonics he was one of the most electric players and someone that you always wanted to watch. Unfortunately as his career went on his weight went up, his conditioning went down, and the guy that could rain down those haymaker dunks was gone. I hate seeing elite talent waste away and that’s what happened with Kemp.
For his career Kemp made over $91 million. The last team that he played for was the Orlando Magic.
One other reason that I posted this jersey is because of the dual photobombing going on in the background with the bunny ears and dude flexing.
I am only including this Carlos Boozer Chicago Bulls jersey as an example of what not to wear. I don’t think it’s possible that anyone likes Carlos Boozer (just ask Cavs, Jazz, and now Bulls fans). There is nothing cool about a guy that gets paid a ton and underperforms (especially in the 4th quarter).
Overall I give the jerseys of this Dave Matthews Band concert a D-. There were no hidden gems, the jerseys were too common, and if not for the custom DMB jerseys the grade would have been a resounding F. At least those DMB jerseys had a bit of uniqueness to them (even if they were for Dave Matthews).
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